STAY STRONG, for no one other than yourself!

I watched Demi Lovado’s show on MTV the one day “STAY STRONG” that had much effect on me.
I am not going through the same situation as she has gone through but the things she said and how the other people said she helped them just felt like it hit home?

Where am I going with this? Well this is something that everyone goes through, daily challenges and struggles people face not just adults but teenagers and young school kids.
I am not saying I am perfect and I am not saying I don’t judge sadly I admit I do find myself looking at a person and what they are wearing and wonder why they are wearing that or why they with that person and yes so it goes on and on. I try not to for who am I to judge people when I don’t even know them? Is it not funny how fast we are to judge and point fingers but when it comes to ourselves we at times don’t see our own faults? In this day and century we live in people expect others to look a certain way, be and act a certain way in order to fit in. and as the saying goes “WHY TRY SO HARD TO FIT IN WHEN YOU WERE MADE TO STAND OUT?” One memory that is stuck with me was when I was at youth the one evening most probably grade 11, I was going through that stage where you feel like you alone as a person is not good enough so I felt like I needed to be who my friends and family wanted me to be so that I could fit in or be accepted. And so that evening we sat in a circle and I think we were just sing with the youth leader while he played guitar and prayed and then he said my name. I have always wanted a message from God, some sort of direction of some kind or a sign you know. And that evening I got one the youth leader said “God told him that he made me to stand out, like I am the bright pink amongst the browns and I will do great things and I will travel” and well he was right about the travel as I did go to Au Pair 2 years after that but the part of I was made to stand out is stuck to my heart and I try remind myself that, and yes it is hard.

There are so many pills, machines and new diets out there that you in a way just feel hopeless looking for it and out of the 100 to just pick one and do it. And to be honest I am not the type who likes the diets, who would eat 3 small meals a day in order to only loose 5 kg and then once done gain it all back and more. We all want to be thin but not to be healthy  most just want to be thin because that’s what we are for some reason MEANT to look like, we push our bodies as far as it can go and even further just to look that way. We break ourselves down and we change completely but then what then? I won’t lie I to want to be thin and feel beautiful, and it is hard when you are around people and all they do is talk about how big they are and how much weight they want to lose when they are not even that fat when I would kill to be the size they are or look like them. At times I can honestly say I do feel confident in who I am and how I look I might not be super skinny and might not fit into a size 0 and all that but I do feel pretty but as normal you do get your “FAT” days when you feel like nothing fits and you feel like the biggest person in the room type day and I guess it is normal but it really isn’t the best mood to be in.

I won’t say I am depressed or anything I do have at times a day to day struggle of being confident and being happy with who I am and what I look like. It does honestly help when I have Willem look me in the eyes and tell me I am beautiful or look stunning today I do appreciate it and for me I would only want to look good for him. But there is still at times when what he sees is not what I see or feel and somehow I need to change that mind set?

What’s sad for me is when you get together with family or friends that you have not seen in a while for some reason the first thing that always comes up for some reason is the weight and how big or small you have gotten. When family and friends is meant to be the ones to boost you up and accept you and like you and love you for who you are and not what you look like they are at times the first to break you. It takes a long time to build up confidence and it takes just a second to break it down.

Now why this post? Well I do guess it is bothering me I do see people on the TV of how they getting bullied telling their story of things they went through and how people hurt the with words, what have people come to these days? Why are we doing this to one another? Why do you try so hard to break another person down which leaves them damaged or scared for life or having them be so tired of it all too just want to take their life and end it all right there? Just because they don’t dress like you or just because they are a little bit bigger than you. Part of me just wants to start a whole stop bullying or stop judging thing not sure what but you know when you feel like you just have to do something I feel that I feel like people should stop using words to break each other down.

Stop looking at yourself and hating what you see, stop looking at celebrities and wish you looking like that I know I should do the same and at times it is easier said than done but in time we all get to where we want and hope to be. Baby steps?

To sum it down just be who you are, have people say what they want to about you have them look at you and judge you but they are no better than you we all have our own imperfections something we wish we could change just be who you are and who God made you to be. We are not better than anyone. Some people are blessed more than others but yet that does not give us the right to judge and make fun of those who are not.

I bought a book called “BOY” the cover says something of how her son killed himself. Now I am not interested to read of how he killed himself I guess I am just interested in the story line she would write about, and why he did it. Things like this break my heart hearing stories of people who took their lives cause of others who thought they could judge them and break them down.

Here is the picture of the book!

I hear David's strangled voice saying: "Come home. You've got to come home", and I say, "I'm coming. What's happened?" He is choking, strangled, and he sounds so strange, not like David. He somehow gasps out the words: "He's killed himself."

I am going to try and start the book tonight so will let you know when I am half way through the book of what it is about and all.

So to sum it up just remember don’t judge and be yourself! Everyone else is taken!