Growing up is never easy.....

Growing up is never easy.... but some times its got to get done...

I know I am only 22, Turning 23 if I may Add. But I honestly think that the journey my life has been on as taught me a lot and it has gotten me to where I am today. Would I have done things Differently? Nope Not really looking at how things turned out now, Would I have not dated some guys I did? Nope through them I know what I wanted and needed most in a guy, even through the heart break.Would I have gone out more and try new things?, maybe but nothing is stopping me today to try them.

I guess why I wanted to do a blog post today was just of all the things that have been going on and driving home today I actually felt like I was a Grown Up How that the way my amazing parents raised me made me the person I hoped to be one day.

After School I was blessed enough with the opportunity to go to America and going from clubbing every weekend to being so to say responsible second type mother to kids changed me and made me more mature in some sense (cant be all too boring now can I?) I learned how to be more confident around groups of people to talk more (and maybe some would say, Too Much) But either way I have grown and coming home I knew what I sort of wanted to take on next in life.

My Parents really done an amazing Job. They were always there and they learned us so much things that still to this day i take with me and will one day teach my children, they were and still are always there for me. I miss them so much every day and It is still an adjustment to not always say well my parents will help or they got it now its me but i know they there if i needed to fall back on them.

I always say to them that i have no words not enough thank you's to give them for who they are in my life and I truly appreciate them so much. I love you guys xoxoxo

I listened to this song Over and Over while I was over sea and this week it played and I can sort of relate to it again but these lyrics i think applies the most and it hits home the most to me:

"This downtown apartment sure makes me miss home
And those bills there on the counter
Keep telling me I'm on my own (With Leroy)
And just like every Sunday I called momma up last night
And even when it's not, I tell her everything's alright (And i do tell her the bad parts too)
Before we hung up I said
'Hey momma, don't forget to tell my baby sister (Brother, Unless my mom has something else she forgot to tell me) I'll see her in the fall
And tell Memaw  (This wold be my Dogs)that I miss her
Yeah, I should give her a call (Ok so i cant call them but I should visit them)
And make sure you tell Daddy that I'm still his little girl (This always brings tears to my eyes)
Yeah, I still feel like I'm where I'm supposed to be
Don't forget to remember me" 

Those simple words but yet they have to much meaning.

I know my parents say that the house is Quite now and how my dad tells others how he misses me and tries to stop those tears from falling by covering it with a joke (yeah daddy i see right through you) And his sweet random I love and miss you messages that starts the tears. But cant imagine life with out those messages

I miss my family and i do get home sick some times, but they are not a plane ride, skype call, different time zones away anymore and that helps. My family is my world and so me being the soft girl i am i do get my times where all i find myself doing is looking at old pictures and miss them. 

But through it all right now in this spot feeling tired after a long day and week at work busting my butt knowing i need to study as i have exams coming up planning things and all I am proud of myself and so happy that I am blessed enough to be where i am today. I have been through some hard times that challenged me as a person but made me stronger, and some heartbreaks thinking I will never really find what I hope to have in life and Just like that i am sitting in my house a house i share with an amazing guy who loves me for who i am, who sits with me and all my weird ways who loves my cooking ( hopefully ) and who cares for me more than i could have hoped for so much that it feels unreal. 

And with that I still get to see my friends and family the ones that I have left, the ones who sticks with me when it gets tough and helps me out and who celebrates with me when its going good and yet ready to catch me if i were to fall.

I guess this Blog is saying more of

I AM BLESSED 

and mostly i might not see it as often as I should and we normally forget but today I realize it and am so grateful for it.

I can not believe that May is nearly so to say dusted and gone. Next month there is a few events happening and I am just looking forward to what else God has in store for my life......